


Surfing for Answers

by ddelusionall



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, JYJ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Merpeople, Angst, Arranged Marriage, Clashing of two worlds, Homophobia, Hopeful Ending, Internalized Homophobia, Surfing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-13
Updated: 2013-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:09:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23929714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddelusionall/pseuds/ddelusionall
Summary: Changmin is floundering with nothing to keep him above water. Yoochun is running with nothing to show him where he belongs. Both are drowning under deep expectations.
Relationships: Jung Yunho/Shim Changmin, Kim Jaejoong/Original Female Character(s), Kim Jaejoong/Park Yoochun, Park Yoochun/Original Female Character(s), Park Yoochun/Shim Changmin
Kudos: 1





	Surfing for Answers

**Author's Note:**

> I am importing my stories from LiveJournal. The original fic can be found [here](http://be-ddelusionall.livejournal.com/).
> 
> I haven't read this story in a long time, so I may have missed some tags. Just let me know if I did.

Changmin’s favorite time to surf was early morning and late evening. Usually the crowds of tourists didn’t invade the beach until the sun was up. Only the locals braved the waves when there was barely enough light to see the rocks.

Changmin paddled out through the lapping surf. The edge of the waves curled in front of him. He heard a shout behind him and looked, seeing his friend Junsu with his own board. Junsu waved and ran into the water.

Changmin smirked and paddled faster. Early morning competition. Well, Junsu wasn’t competition. Changmin was a much better surfer than he was. The tide was low, but the ocean wasn’t choppy enough for Changmin to worry about the rocks hiding under the surf off to his left. He eyed the curl of surf in front of him, moving with it, board rising above it and dropping on the other side. He let one more wave by him and then turned his board for the next one.

He heard Junsu shout something, but then the wave formed and lifted him and he waited, timing it and put his hands on his board and stood up. His feet planted, knees bent and arms out. Balancing for the first twist, he dropped the nose of his board into wave, pressed his feet back, turned, leaning and rode the wave until it died near the shore.

Junsu cheered and Changmin lifted an arm in victory but knocked himself off balance and he fell into the water. He surfaced soon enough to see Junsu make it half down a wave before bailing and being swallowed by the curve of foam.

Changmin laughed and climbed back on his board. He paddled out to Junsu just in time to see Junsu haul himself up on his board.

“Fail, as always,” Changmin said.

Junsu spit ocean water at him.

Changmin laughed. They paddled a bit farther out until they were riding the small waves. Changmin sat up, straddling his board, staring off into the ocean. The sun sparkled on the Eastern rim of the horizon.

“Water is pretty flat this morning,” Junsu said after a few minutes.

Not far away, a tail fin lifted from the water, throwing sparkles of droplets through the sky.

“Wow, that was a neat fin,” Junsu said. “Do you know what kind of fish that was?”

Changmin shook his head. “I’m a surfer, not a fisherman.”

Junsu laughed. “And you’re not a student either. Are you going to school today?”

Changmin shrugged. “I don’t know. Probably not. I’ve missed so much, what’s the point?”

“You’re smart, dongsaeng. You should be studying.”

“You’re not smart, hyung. You should be studying harder.”

Junsu shouted at the insult and chopped his arm in the water, spraying Changmin. When Changmin cleared his eyes, Junsu was paddling out to the waves.

He really should have gone to school. But it depended on the waves.

Changmin paddled quickly to catch up to him. Junsu was turning when Changmin hit the same wave. He cursed and tried to turn enough to catch it and instead was tossed into the ocean when he stood up on his board. The wave flipped his board and slammed him into the sandy bottom. The water churned around him, and he opened his eyes and then squeezed them shut when he got nothing but sand in his eyes. Hands curled on his arm and hauled him up to the surface. He spluttered and wiped his eyes. He opened his eyes to thank Junsu for helping him up and froze. Junsu was at least twenty feet away, straddling his board, laughing at him.

Changmin spun around, but it was still just the two of them in the ocean while the sun rose.

He had definitely felt a hand on his arm.

His board bumped against him and he jumped, spinning again. But there was nothing. Just his board and the lightly lapping water.

“Min, come on, the waves are kickin’ up!”

Changmin turned to Junsu who was paddling out again. He jumped on his board and paddled out to meet him.

“You okay?”

Changmin opened his mouth and then shut it and nodded. “Fine.”

The white water was higher on each wave, curling faster after the wakes. Changmin grinned. His morning just got better.

Junsu cried out in jubilation as his board turned. He jumped to his feet and Changmin watched him until the next wave came. There was nothing better than the rush of riding a wave to the bottom. By the time the waves were high enough to tempt the tourists and others into the water, Changmin had forgotten about the feel of hands on his arm and back.

\--

Across the bay, indigo eyes watched the two friends play around and surf. Yoochun had been watching Changmin for months, and knew he was a good swimmer. There’d been no reason to help him earlier, except that Yoochun had gotten too close and just couldn’t help himself. He twisted his light indigo tail and ended up pressed against the rock. Surf broke on the other side, spraying him with water. He shut his eyes and leaned his head against the wet rock. His thick black hair flowed around his shoulders.

“You are insane!” Jaejoong shouted as soon as he surfaced next to Yoochun. “Completely insane.”

Yoochun smiled at his best friend, but did not reply. Getting that close to the coast when it was supposedly empty was crazy in itself. To go when there were actually people in the water was unheard of.

Yoochun caught one more glimpse of the tall surfer and then sank under the water. He shut his eyes and spun slowly and sat on the sandy bottom. His hair floated around him, blocking some of the sun filtering through the water.

“You are crazy,” Jaejoong said again, settling beside him.

Yoochun nodded. “I-I touched him.”

“You what?!?” Jaejoong screeched.

Yoochun smiled and tilted his head back. “I touched him. His arm. His ... god, he is so strong.”

“You are insane! What if he had seen you?”

Yoochun did not answer.

“Chunnie, you cannot. You cannot let him see you.”

“I know, okay. I know.” Yoochun pushed up from the sand and swam away from the coast.

Jaejoong followed him silently.

It was a stupid crush, he knew that. Having a crush on a human was more common than the leaders of their Clan wanted to admit. Even Jaejoong had spent a few hours a day for more than three months pinning after a human that liked to jog along the beach. The human never went in the water though.

It almost seemed like destiny that Yoochun’s human crush liked to swim almost as much as Yoochun did.

They swam down, following the ocean floor, cutting under and through the reef along the Korean coast. The sand dropped off and Yoochun pointed his body down, arms at his side. His tail waved back and forth quickly. He ignored a few salutations from others in his clan and headed straight to his home, through the kelp fronds blocking his room from the rest of the world. He wanted to be alone, but Jaejoong knew better than to leave him alone.

“You can not,” Jaejoong whispered.

“Shut up. Do not talk about it,” Yoochun snapped.

Jaejoong pouted and fell to a kelp-covered rock. He crossed his arms and pouted. “You will get in so much trouble.”

“Especially if you keep talking about it where other people can hear you!”

“Sorry,” Jaejoong said, his pout more pronounced.

Yoochun sighed and sank down next to him. Their arms wound around each other, and Jaejoong ran his deep turquoise tail up Yoochun’s, drawing a shiver from him.

“And you will get in trouble if you keep doing that to me,” Yoochun whispered.

“We are friends. It doesn’t mean the same. And you will be with Sooyoung soon.”

Yoochun frowned at the reminder. “You are just determined to get me in trouble today,” Yoochun muttered.

“At least with the human--”

“Be quiet,” Yoochun hissed.

Jaejoong huffed. “I do not want you to get in trouble.”

Yoochun turned his head and met Jaejoong’s eyes. Green eyes that matched his tail, surrounded by the fall of darker hair than Yoochun’s.

Everything about Jaejoong’s features screamed Clan Warrior. He had broad shoulders, strong sculpted muscles, and a small waist that flowed seamlessly into his long tail.

But Yoochun was a disappointment. He wasn’t necessarily weak and he did have nice square shoulders, but he did not build muscles like Jaejoong. His chest was smaller, his stomach toned instead of cobbled. And his tail was almost the color of most females. It was just on this edge of blue, but in certain light it looked purple and with his slimmer arms and slimmer waist, he’d been confused with a mermaid more than once.

Maybe that was why Jaejoong was attracted to him. And why he was attracted to Jaejoong. Next to Sooyoung’s tail, Yoochun’s did look blue. But laying here, next to Jaejoong, his tail was purple.

Yoochun hated it.

Jaejoong tightened his hold on Yoochun’s body and pulled Yoochun close enough to tuck his head under his chin. They were out of sight from Yoochun’s window, and they’d see the water churning from someone coming up through the home, but the thought of being discovered in such a position had Yoochun’s heart racing and water streaming rapidly through his gills.

Jaejoong was the Clan Leader’s only son. He had duties to fulfill.

And Yoochun was betrothed to his sister. And they were just friends.

Yoochun wondered if he could swim away. If he did, would Jaejoong go with him? He would not ask.

\---

Sometimes Changmin liked to paddle out almost too far on his board, lay back and float his way to shore. It wasn’t entirely safe since his board and his legs would look pretty tasty to a shark, but there hadn’t been a shark sighting on this beach for at least three years.

It was early evening. The sun was sinking on the other side of the sky. Changmin watched the brightest stars pop out in the growing darkness.

He needed to get back to shore. Skipping school wasn’t the same as skipping work. He had to earn enough money to feed his mom and sister. His mom’s paycheck went to pay for his sister’s school fees.

He was a lost cause. He told his mom to stop paying his school fees. Junsu said his desk was given to a new student. And his sister got a brand new uniform. One where the skirt actually zipped and she didn’t have to hide the fact that it was too small with one of his larger white shirts.

Changmin had liked school. He had liked to learn and read. But then their father left. And their mother was never home. And too busy or too tired to talk to about the things he was learning. It lost its appeal.

And then he had to get a job. Working a few hours at a ramen shop five nights a week didn’t earn too much, but it was the least he could do.

School didn’t seem that important when his mother was starving so she could feed her two children.

Changmin suddenly realized how dark it was. He cursed and moved to flip over on his board at the same moment that a small swell picked him up and dropped him down. He lost his grip on his board and fell into the water. Sputtering, he shot to the surface and cursed even more when he saw his board floating away from him. He forgot to hook the leash to his foot.

He turned to the shore. He could easily swim back, but he wasn’t leaving his board. It was the most expensive thing he owned and it took him over a year to save up the money for it.

Before he could take the first stroke toward the board, he realized that it was moving toward him. That made no sense. The tide was ebbing, pulling everything out from the shore. It was why he managed to get so far away just floating.

He blinked in the dark and shook his head. But the board was still moving straight to him. A few feet away he saw fingers curled on the rail. His mouth dropped open and he barely had a moment to register that when his board bumped him in the chest. He gripped onto it, arm flung over the deck.

Hands. Those were definitely hands that moved to the nose, steadying the board, and Changmin used the extra help and climbed on. When he was secure, the hands disappeared.

Changmin didn’t think he could be more surprised, and then a head popped up from the water, and he stared and stared and stared, mouth still open. It was too hard to see in the dark, and Changmin couldn’t tell if it was a guy or a girl. Long hair flowed on the top of water like seaweed. Blue eyes shimmered in the dark. Lips were sucked into his mouth, and Changmin knew that whoever this was was worried.

Changmin swallowed. “T-th-thanks.”

The head ducked under the water.

“W-wait,” Changmin almost shouted.

And it returned. A hand lifted and moved hair from milky skin. A strong jawline, square shoulders.

Definitely male.

Changmin swallowed again. “Do ... d-do need a ride back to shore?”

A shy smile curved the man’s mouth and he shook his head. He suddenly turned to the right, hearing something Changmin didn’t. He bit his lower lip, looked at Changmin, and then bolted away faster than Changmin thought anyone could swim. He was about to call out for him, and then the man’s body curled up, arching over the water, and pierced it in a clean dive, down below a swell and swallowed by the ocean, a tail fin slapping in the water last.

Changmin almost fell off his board again.

He sat there, decided that he had fallen asleep on his board and dreamed the whole thing and began the long swim back to shore.

Changmin had heard the tales of sailors saved by mermaids.

But he had never, ever believed them. Fuck, he still wasn’t sure he believed it. When he finally dragged himself and his board up on the sand, he was almost convinced that he’d imagined it. He turned around, stared at the dark ocean sparkling with moonlight. Something moved near the rocky outcrop. A shadow. It could have been a seal. It could have been anything.

Changmin didn’t know, but he lifted his arm and waved anyway, before turning around and practically sprinting for home. He was going to be very late for work.

\---

Yoochun sequestered himself in their garden. He barricaded himself in the anemone grotto and refused to come out of the farthest corner.

He was in so much trouble. So much trouble.

When even his younger brother couldn’t get him to explain himself, they sent for Jaejoong. It’d been weeks since Yoochun had last seen his best friend. Jaejoong was training with the Clan leaders. There had been a shark too close to their village, and it was up to the men to either chase it off, or kill it.

It was Jaejoong’s very first shark hunt.

Yoochun had not been deemed strong enough to go.

Yoochun felt the water around him churn and recognized Jaejoong’s presence, just before he whispered, “Chunnie-ah?”

Yoochun bit his lip and turned his head, eyes so full of guilt and hope and love.

Jaejoong immediately dropped to the rock floor beside him. “Oh, Chunnie, what did you do?”

Yoochun had no idea if anyone was outside the grotto listening, so he did nothing more than accept Jaejoong’s hug and a soft touch of his hand down his arm.

“Everyone is worried about you,” Jaejoong asked. “Is this about the hunt?”

An out. Yoochun looked up, grateful for the opportunity. It meant that someone was indeed listening outside of the grotto, because Jaejoong knew that Yoochun hadn’t cared that much about not being able to go. At least he didn’t anymore. Jaejoong knew that this was about something else.

Yoochun nodded. “It’s just not fair. I’m strong and quick.”

“I know. Maybe next year.”

It was the same thing his very disappointed father had said when the Clan Leader had left after bearing the shaming news.

Yoochun sighed. “Are you busy? Can we go for a swim?”

“Maybe during the next tide.”

Yoochun tilted his head up and smiled. “Okay.”

Their lips were so close, their bodies brushing against each other. Yoochun hoped that had they been alone, Jaejoong would have kissed him. There had been many opportunities in the past for them to kiss, but Jaejoong had never done so.

Maybe Yoochun only thought Jaejoong was attracted to him. Maybe this was the way all best friends felt about each other. He had no idea.

Jaejoong’s presence did not get his body thrumming the way the human surfer’s did though. And they hadn’t even been that close.

“Come on,” Jaejoong said after another strong hug. “Your mother is very worried about you.”

Two tides later, the two of them swam out into the basin. It wasn’t the safest place because of shark and squid attacks as well as possible human boats above, but it was easy for them to talk and know if someone was coming.

There was a rock, jutting from the bottom. Yoochun went there, flung a few lobsters off the rock and sat right on the tip. Jaejoong floated next to him. He was wearing his brand new spear, strapped across his back in an intricately designed holster of kelp and bone. A belt was secured around his waist that held two stone daggers and bone claw from a walrus tusk.

“You’re going to kill me,” Yoochun said and looked up at the ocean surface.

“You went to see your surfer again?” Jaejoong guessed.

Yoochun nodded. “He ... he got too far from shore ... lost his board.”

“Did he see you?”

Yoochun winced. and nodded. “Yeah. He ...”

“Yoochun,” Jaejoong admonished.

“I know, I know, but he ... he would have swam for his board into deeper water and then swam back to shore and ... it was dark. He was the only one in the water, and he ... he ...”

Yoochun spun around and gripped Jaejoong’s shoulders. “He didn’t scream. He didn’t panic. He thanked me and--”

“He spoke to you?”

Yoochun sighed and tilted his head back again. “He asked if I needed a ride to shore. He thought ...”

“He thought you were human.”

“Yeah. And then he stood on the sand and waved to me. I mean ... he could have been waving a bug off his face or something, but he waved, and I know he was looking at the rocks.”

“You are in so much trouble.”

“Please don’t tell,” Yoochun said grabbing his hand. He brought it up to his chest. “Please.” Whisper soft, Yoochun added, “Promise me?”

Jaejoong frowned, eyes flicking down to Yoochun’s lips. They stopped there, and Yoochun held his breath. After a long moment, Jaejoong sighed and pulled Yoochun against him for a hug. “I won’t tell. But you be careful. Night and early morning. When he’s alone. Please. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I promise I’ll be careful.” Shaking, Yoochun pressed a light kiss to Jaejoong’s shoulder. It wasn’t the same as a kiss promise, but it did mean the same thing to Yoochun.

Jaejoong squeezed him and then smiled down at him before letting Yoochun go. He reached behind him and pulled out the spear. “Want me to teach you to throw it?”

Yoochun smiled widely and nodded. His father wouldn’t teach him until the Clan Leader said he was ready.

Jaejoong was almost a Clan Warrior, and would be the next Clan Leader. Yoochun supposed that meant he could do what he wanted.

They’d get in trouble if someone saw them, but not in nearly as much trouble if someone found out that Yoochun had let a human see him.

\---

Four in the morning.

In September.

Soon it’d be too cold for even the best wetsuit to protect against the water.

Changmin sat on his board, staring out into open water. He sighed. The water was so calm, it was almost eerie.

Changmin was not ready to admit defeat. He knew what he had seen and he knew that it wasn’t a dream.

But it’d been weeks now. He still couldn’t sleep without the handsome face of the man in his mind.

Merman.

A man with a fish tail. It was so hard to keep believing. He looked up everything he could about merpeople. Everything was speculation. None of the “real footage” looked anything like the merman he had seen.

He had asked Junsu if he believed in mermaids. Ever helpful, Junsu had laughed at him and said the next time he had weed to let him smoke some.

There was a splash to his left, and Changmin jerked his head that way. Something moved in the water toward him, under the surface, straight at him. His heart raced and he turned, paddling for shore. He moved only a few feet before fingers wrapped around his ankle and pulled him back.

Changmin choked on a scream, rolled off his board, shutting his mouth too late, and ended up with a mouthful of seawater. Strong arms lifted him above the surface and he sputtered and coughed.

When his vision cleared, he came face to face with the same wide eyes, full lips, and apple cheeks. The man’s skin was milky pale. His eyes were lit with something blue-ish purple.

“That was not cool,” Changmin said.

The man smiled and turned his head away.

“Are you really a mermaid?”

He frowned.

“I-I mean a ... merman?”

This time the man laughed, the noise a deep rumble from his chest. He nodded and shifted, and Changmin felt smooth scales up his leg.

“Fuck,” Changmin said and tilted his head back. “Can you talk?”

The man swallowed, but nodded.

“What’s your name?”

“Y-yoochun.” His voice matched his laugh.

Changmin smiled and said, “My name is Changmin.”

“I know.” Color flashed over his skin. Not red, like when Changmin blushed, but almost blue.

Changmin stared. The merman was beyond beautiful. Nothing that Changmin would have ever guessed or seen. He almost looked like anyone else walking around the city, but his hair was thicker, ears pointed. His eyes were slanted on the sides, and his pupils were green instead of black and the purplish-blue color around them bled into the whites of his eyes. And there was pale blue webbing between his fingers.

Changmin could not look away, and he didn’t want to.

But he hadn’t realized that the merman had taken him out to the rocks. Too far from shore.

Changmin clung to him, glad that his board was still connected to his foot.

“I’ve ... I’ve been watching you,” Yoochun whispered. “From here. I like watching surfers, but you ... you love it. You shove your heart and spirit into it. And it always seems like you’re here.”

Changmin nodded. “I am. Through the summer anyway.”

“Summer?”

“When it’s hot.”

“Oh, the ocean doesn’t heat up like the earth. Not where I live. Just on the surface.”

“Where do you live?”

Yoochun pointed out to sea. “That way, about ... I do not know human terms. It is far though. Beyond the reef, below even that. Under the shelf. That is why I cannot come every day, even though I want to. And it is forbidden.”

“What is? To come here?”

“No. It is forbidden to allow a human to see us.”

“Then why did you let me?”

“I ... I-I l-like you.” The merman ducked his head again, hiding his face behind his thick black hair. “Y-you’re very h-h-handsome.”

Changmin swallowed roughly. He’d more than once thought of what it would be like to kiss and touch a male body in that way. Usually Junsu’s, and only at night when he was alone in his bed with a hand wrapped around his cock, and images of Junsu’s naked skin against his. But he’d never acted on it. There were enough reasons in his life for his mother to be disappointed in him. And Junsu would probably knee him in the balls.

Yoochun looked up cautiously and must have seen whatever look was on Changmin’s face and his smile fell. He let Changmin go, but the water was too deep and Changmin wasn’t expecting it so he clung tighter to his shoulders, legs sliding up and over the merman’s tail.

Yoochun shivered and pressed himself against the rock. His arms fell to his sides.

“Don’t misunderstand,” Changmin managed, hooking a foot around Yoochun’s tail. “I’ve never ... ... with ... a guy before. It’s just ... I can’t. I’ve never ...”

Yoochun bit his lip and tentatively put his arms back around Changmin’s waist. “Me neither. It is also forbidden, and another reason why I ...” He shook his head and said nothing else.

“Why you what?” Changmin prodded.

Yoochun met his eyes and looked away.

“Tell me,” Changmin asked softly.

Yoochun rose a pale shoulder from the water. “Why ... why I am not good enough. I am different than other merman, Changmin. Different in a bad way. My best friend is perfect and he is strong and noble and his tail is green and mine is purple like a mermaid’s and he cares for me, but not like that, or he will not let himself care for me like that because he is to be paired with a mermaid, and so am I, but I do not want to and I am not a warrior like he is and I am not strong enough to hunt or fish. No matter what I do, I am noticed only for the bad things. My eyes are not right and my skin is pale and weak. And ... and do you ever feel like you just do not belong? That you are not ever going to be good enough for anyone?”

Yoochun fell silent and Changmin held him tightly, face pressed into his wet hair that smelled of seaweed and salt. He hadn’t understood most of what Yoochun had said about why he was a disappointment, but he certainly knew how it felt. He thought of his mother’s disappointment that he didn’t finish school, that he didn’t have a girlfriend, that he only worked in a ramen shop, that he spent all his day on the water.

“All the fucking time,” Changmin finally replied.

Yoochun’s breathing steadied and he pulled away with a soft blush of color. He looked beyond Changmin, smiling before turning Changmin in his arms. The horizon was bright red, the clouds scattered pink through the sky. The line of light signaling the approaching dawn was almost gold.

“I love watching the sunrise from here,” Yoochun whispered.

Changmin nodded. “Me, too.”

“I better go.”

Changmin turned his head and frowned. “Already?”

“My parents will notice I am not in my room and ask me where I have been.”

Changmin smiled. “My mom knows where I always am. Will you come see me again?”

Yoochun bit his lower lip and nodded. “If you wish it.”

“Oh god, I wish it. Please.”

“I will. I do not know when.”

“Soon. I won’t be able to surf soon. It will be too cold.”

Yoochun looked up at the brightening sky, at the fading white crescent of the moon. “When the night sun is full. I will be here again, before the sun brings the day.”

Changmin nodded. “Okay. Until then.”

Yoochun bit his lip again and then said, “A promise between ... pairings.”

Changmin smiled at the term.

“Promises are special and ... well, I promise that I will be here.” Yoochun licked his lips and then before Changmin could move away, they were pressed against his, cool and smooth. Like the water. Changmin lifted a hand to his cheek, cupping it gently and opened his mouth. Yoochun tasted like kelp and salt. Their tongues just barely touched, and then Yoochun pulled away.

“A promise,” Yoochun gasped.

Changmin nodded. “A promise.”

Finally, Changmin climbed on his board. Yoochun towed him halfway to shore, before the fear of being seen made him stop. He twisted and pressed another kiss to Changmin’s cheek and then disappeared in a swirl of water and a flash of light on his tail.

\---

Yoochun floated through his family’s kelp gardens. He moved from one side of the path to the other, eyes focused on the historical tome in his hands. He carefully turned the page, reading through the traditions of pairings and betrothals. He could not be paired until he became a Warrior.

He had again been told by the Clan Leader that he was not ready.

Even with Jaejoong’s advice and help on the spear, Yoochun was still deemed too weak.

For seven tides, Yoochun had looked for a mention of someone who was not a Warrior when they were paired. There were none.

Nor did he find any mention of two merman being paired. Not that he actually thought he would find a mention of that.

With a sigh, Yoochun sank to a rock and closed the tome. He would never be paired, but he should have been happy about that. He did not even want to be paired. At least not with Sooyoung. But he would never be paired with Jaejoong. Why had he not been born a mermaid? It would have made his life a lot easier.

He had seen Jaejoong with Minji more and more, their arms linked, their tails brushing. His green balanced perfectly with her lavender scales.

Sooyoung’s tail was almost as dark as Yoochun’s but more purple. The only thing that showed who was the merman between them.

The kelp swirled and water churned.

Yoochun lifted his head and smiled when Sooyoung appeared. They were friends, so he was happy to see her. And even though he had not been told he could do Warrior training yet, Sooyoung was very supportive.

“Hello, my pairing.”

Yoochun felt his cheeks warm and he muttered hello.

She chuckled and settled down next to him. Even if it was not exactly allowed yet, Sooyoung slid her tail along Yoochun’s and hooked their tail fins together. Yoochun swallowed and very carefully put his arm around her. She smiled and pressed against him, an arm around his stomach. It felt different than when he sat like this with Jaejoong. There was comfort in Jaejoong, a beauty between their colors.

“I like your tail,” Sooyoung whispered without looking up. “I know you do not think it is the right color, but it is pretty and matches well with mine.”

“Not handsome,” Yoochun muttered.

Sooyoung shrugged. “Says who? It is on you, who is male.” She leaned back and stared at him until he met her eyes. “You do have essential parts that make you male more than the color of your tail, right?”

“Soo!” Yoochun spluttered.

She laughed and found her spot against his body.

Yoochun cleared his gills with a quick huff. “I am sorry.”

“For what?”

Yoochun did not know how to articulate what he was feeling, but Sooyoung deserved the truth.

“I know ... “ Sooyoung stopped talking and moved almost into his lap.

His scales shivered and he held her around the waist. This was definitely not allowed. She rested her arms on his shoulders, fingers of one hand playing with the tie holding his hair back. She loosened it and smiled when the clumps floated up and around them.

After a moment, she said, “I know that I am not who you want.”

Yoochun thought of protesting, but he and Sooyoung really had known each other for a long time. He’d been friends with Jaejoong even before she was born.

“My brother may enjoy your company, but he will never ever admit it to himself.”

Yoochun nodded. “I am sorry.”

“Do not be. Look.” She shifted again, forcing Yoochun to lean back. Their entire bodies touched and again their fins hook together. “We fit well together. I find you incredibly attractive and handsome. Do you not think I am pretty?”

“Yes, of course. You are.”

She smiled. “Then we will survive, and you will be amazing. You will be ready soon, my pairing.”

Yoochun doubted that, but her support was very welcome.

The kelp moved again and Sooyoung dove off him, her hand sliding down his arm just before her brother appeared.

Jaejoong saw how close they were and frowned, but said nothing more than, “There you two are. Both of our mothers have decided that our families are dining together tonight.”

“Tonight,” Yoochun said, heart breaking. tonight was the strongest tide. The highest surge of water when the night sun was largest in the sky.

Jaejoong looked at him and nodded. “I am sorry.”

“I ... I ... “ Yoochun took a very deep breath and nodded. “Of course.”

“Sooyoung. Give us a minute.”

Sooyoung smiled and lifted from the ground. Her hand stayed against Yoochun’s shoulder for a moment before the disappeared within the kelp.

They stared at one another, and it was Jaejoong who looked away. “Are you meeting him ...”

“Yes,” Yoochun said quickly. “At dawn.” He had told Jaejoong of his talk with his surfer. But not of the promise.

“Will you have time?”

Yoochun shrugged. “I will make time.”

Jaejoong finally looked at him. “My sister ...”

“She is my friend, too. She understands me.”

Jaejoong frowned. “What does that mean?”

Yoochun smiled. “She understands you, too.” He swam past Jaejoong, but the other gripped his arm and spun him around.

Still looking down, Jaejoong muttered, “I will help you. Father wants someone to follow you when you disappear. I will do it, and I will help you see your surfer. I promise.”

Yoochun’s breath caught, water stopping through his gills.

“It is the only thing I can promise you.” He leaned forward, and pressed a kiss half to Yoochun’s lips, just to the side, and Yoochun gasped.

Jaejoong let him go, spun around, and disappeared through the kelp.

\----Changmin shivered, rubbing his arms. The water was choppy around him. Wind blew spray in his face. He wouldn’t have been out on the water just yet, if it wasn’t for the promise he made Yoochun. It was a bit dangerous out in the water when it was so dark. Though the moon shone brightly above and around him, sinking toward the horizon and throwing sparkles on the churning water.

He had been out there for an hour already. He couldn’t stay much longer. The water was too cold, the wind too strong.

“Changmin,” a soft voice carried over the wind.

Changmin turned around, board rocking in the waves. He smiled at Yoochun’s head just above water and paddled over.

“You are freezing,” Yoochun said with a frown.

Changmin shrugged, rubbing his arms. “It’s cold out.”

Yoochun smiled. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes.” There was no hesitation.

Yoochun gripped the front of the board, turned and pulled him out farther, to the rocks and around the edge, much farther than was safe if he’d been on his own. Around the rock was a ledge, and a small enclosure. Yoochun held the board steady and Changmin lifted himself up to it. In a moment, he was blocked from the wind. Yoochun pressed his hands to the shelf and lifted himself from the water. His tail was deep purple in the moonlight. The muscles in his arms stood out, shadowed in the moonlight. He walked on his arms.

There wasn’t enough room for both of them, but that didn’t stop Yoochun from crawling close, his tail flicking up out of the water.

And the only option Changmin had was to wrap his arms around Yoochun’s upper body.

His skin wasn’t nearly as cold as Changmin was expecting.

“I can’t believe this is real,” Changmin whispered, hand running up and down Yoochun’s strong back.

Yoochun smiled and flicked his tail out of the water.

“Are you okay out of the water like this?”

“For a little while.”

Changmin’s hand went up his side, along his ribs and under his arm, and slipped under a fold of skin.

“Ow,” Yoochun said and jerked. “Gills. Don’t do that.”

“Sorry. You have gills and you breathe air. That is really, really cool.”

Yoochun laughed. “You have legs and you can walk on land and swim. That is really cool.”

“You don’t have legs?”

Yoochun shook his head. “No. There are stories of mythical creatures that turn from fish to human, but they do not exist.”

“Oh.” Changmin frowned. He’d spent the last couple weeks wondering what it would be like to fool around with a human Yoochun. Now, he wasn’t even sure how that would work. And he most definitely wasn’t about to ask.

“How long can you stay out of the water?” Changmin asked instead.

Yoochun shrugged against him. “Technically? I do not need to be in the water since I do breathe air, but humans ... we are not supposed to get close to humans. They will hurt us.”

“I won’t,” Changmin said, voice softer than he meant.

“I know. If you meant to hurt me, you would have had boats out here searching for me. But I cannot stay long. I am supposed to be sleeping.”

“Stay until the sun rises?”

Changmin felt Yoochun smile and his body shifted, settling against him. “Of course.”

It wasn’t much warmer up in the crevice, except for Yoochun’s body weight. As time passed, his tail grew courser against Changmin’s legs. He wanted to run his hands up and down it, learn every curve and detail. His tailfin stayed in the water, flipping up and covering them with a light spray every now and then. Changmin kept his hands on Yoochun’s back, sliding over the drying skin to his shoulders and down his spine.

“So what do you do?” Yoochun finally asked.

“Besides surfing?”

“Yeah.”

“I work in a ramen shop.”

“What is a ramen shop?”

Changmin smiled. “A shop is a place that sells things. And ramen is a kind of food, made out of noodles.”

“Oh, so you work at an eating. That is what we call them.”

“What do you do?”

Yoochun stiffened and then sighed and relaxed. “I ... I am not of the working class; my father is a Head Warrior in the Clan. I am to train under him and become a Warrior.”

“But?”

Yoochun shrugged. “I am not strong enough.”

“Really? You look strong to me.”

“You would not think that if you saw Jaejoong. He is very strong. Much stronger than me.”

“Well, are you doing stuff to make you stronger, like exercising?”

Yoochun lifted his head and looked at him with such a look of disbelief that Changmin cleared his throat in uncomfortableness.

“A merman is born to be a Warrior. When they are deemed strong enough. I cannot train until I am strong enough.”

“That doesn’t make much sense.”

Yoochun huffed and his tail flicked out of the water. “Most mermen are chosen to start training when they are many tide cycles younger than me. I am weak.”

“Says who?”

“The Clan Leader, my father, the other mermen.”

“Does Jaejoong, your friend, think you’re weak?”

“He treats me like a mermaid.”

Changmin did not know what to say about that.

Yoochun turned his head to the slightly brightening horizon. “Well, I guess that is not fair. He is teaching me to throw his spear. He is helping me get stronger, and he could get in trouble for that.”

“He’s a good friend.”

“Is Junsu a good friend to you?”

Changmin smiled. “Yeah. He’s a great guy. I don’t see him much anymore since I don’t go to school now, but he still comes out and surfs with me before I have to work.”

“School? You do not go to school?”

“Not anymore.”

“Why not?”

Changmin sighed. “I don’t really want to talk about it.”

“I understand.”

They lay together in silence, watching the edge of the water brighten with the sun. Changmin winced against the light, tilting his head back to look up at the full moon.

“Yoochun,” a voice said from below.

Yoochun sighed.

Changmin turned, and just saw another head above the water.

“Will you meet me again?”

“It’s almost too cold,” Changmin said carefully. “I want to. I do, but this morning, I almost froze.”

Yoochun nodded. “It is cold on the surface. Just one more time. When the night sun is half gone.”

Changmin nodded. It was only a couple more weeks. He would be okay.

“Promise?”

Changmin smiled and said, “Yes, I promise.”

Like last time, their lips touched in a soft kiss. Yoochun did not pull away until the other said his name again. He wiggled backwards and fell into the water, ducking under. Changmin could just see him below the surface. The other cleared his throat, and Changmin met cautious dark eyes. The sun rose behind him, throwing his beautiful face in shadow. Like Yoochun his hair was dark, but pulled back away from his face. Changmin saw a thin, tapered stone behind him, the end of which was pale, like ivory.

“This is forbidden,” the merman said.

Yoochun surfaced and smiled at the other merman. “This is Jaejoong.”

Changmin nodded in greeting.

“I will take him closer to shore,” Yoochun said to Jaejoong, “and then go back with you.”

Jaejoong’s eyes narrowed, but he did not say anything else.

\---

Yoochun cautiously lifted his head above the water. He had not sensed anyone in the water, but that did not mean there were not humans or boats somewhere. His eyes focused on the beach, and the lone figure standing at the shore. Yoochun was not sure if it was Changmin, he could not really tell from this far out, but he assumed it was. There was not any other reason for a human to be out on the beach at this time of the morning.

Yoochun ducked back under the water and swam toward shore. He could feel the chill of the water on his skin which meant it would be even colder to a human. Probably why Changmin was not in the water.

Yoochun did not want to swim this close to the beach. He knew that Jaejoong was behind him somewhere, and his friend would drag him away from the beach when he had the chance.

He surfaced again, this time able to tell that it was indeed Changmin on the beach. His entire body was covered in heavy clothing. Yoochun frowned because that meant that Changmin was not going to get in the water.

Changmin turned and spotted him, and even in the dark, Yoochun could see his smile. He quickly bent down and rolled up the cloth covering his legs and walked into the light surf. The wind was not blowing like it had been a couple weeks ago, but Changmin shivered when the first wave hit his skin.

Yoochun propelled himself forward until the was almost crawling on the sandy shore. Waves broke over his head. He heard Jaejoong shout a warning behind him, but he kept going. He stopped just in front of Changmin and the other was so tall, staring down at him. Changmin actually crouched and reached out his hand, pressing it to his head.

Yoochun smiled and propped up on his arms. His tail flipped out of the water.

“Sorry,” Changmin whispered, teeth chattering. “Winter is hitting fast and the water is freezing.”

Yoochun nodded. “Thank you for coming to meet me anyway.”

“Of course. You seem happy.”

Yoochun’s smile widened. “The Clan Leader finally said I could start training. Not to be a full Warrior just yet, but it is a good start and Jaejoong keeps helping me get stronger.”

“That’s awesome.”

“Awesome?”

“It’s cool. It’s good. You know. A good thing.”

Yoochun nodded. “Yeah. It is awesome.”

A heavy wave lifted Yoochun off the sand and almost knocked Changmin over. It soaked into his pants.

“Sorry,” Yoochun said. “You should go. You are freezing.”

Changmin frowned. “When will I see you again? It’s going to be cold for months.”

Yoochun smiled and said, “Because of my training I do not have a lot of time anyway. I had to sneak out to come see you now.”

“I can come out in a boat,” Changmin offered.

Yoochun shook his head, wet hair flailing. “No. I ... I do not ... We will not go near boats. It is too easy to be sucked into their power and harmed.”

Changmin nodded. “Yeah, but I want to see you.”

“I want to see you, too. But I will be busy with my training. Maybe ... maybe it is better. It is less dangerous than doing this.”

Changmin sighed in defeat. He looked up and down the beach and then dropped to his knees in the surf. His entire body shivered from the shock of cold water, but he reached forward. Yoochun moved closer to him, body half out of the water.

Changmin ran his hands down Yoochun’s shoulders and then touched fingertips to the scaled edge of his tail.

Yoochun shivered and wrapped his arms around Changmin’s waist.

A wave broke over them, and Changmin gasped as water landed high on his chest.

“As soon as I can, I’ll be back in the water,” Changmin said.

“I will come find you.”

“Promise?” Changmin asked.

Yoochun lifted his head and smiled. Changmin ducked down and their lips touched and then joined. Another wave broke over them, and Changmin fell back, soaking him up to his neck. The wave pulled Yoochun forward, over him and Changmin wrapped his arms around his waist and his legs around his tail. The waves moved their bodies, and Yoochun tried to breathe through the pleasure coursing through his stomach. Their lips stayed together for a little longer. The sun broke over the horizon, throwing sparkles of orange light on the water around them.

“Changmin!”

In less than a second, Yoochun was gone. He pressed his hands to the sand, disappeared into the low wave and pushed back. His stomach dragged on the sand, his tail flipped up above the surf and then he was deep enough to swim away from the beach.

In seconds, he came face to face with Jaejoong. A very angry irate Jaejoong.

Yoochun smiled at him and surfaced very carefully. With just his eyes above the waterline again, he watched as Junsu tried to pull Changmin away from the water. He was on his feet, but turned toward the ocean. Yoochun saw him smile and with an answering grin, he turned, descended and let his tail flick out of the surf in a farewell.

Yoochun knew he would go back. He did not know when, but he would go back.

\---

With surfing out of the equation until the weather warmed up, Changmin took a night class to help him finish high school. He absolutely hated it, but it was nice because he was able to go at his own pace and he wasn’t as bored as he had been when he’d gone to regular school. He had almost been done anyway. Part of him was glad that he didn’t have to go to high school, but the other part of him knew that he shouldn’t have left to begin with.

Changmin had enough credits and knowledge before his eighteenth birthday to be considered a high school graduate.

His mom wanted him to take college placement tests, but they did not have the money to put him through college.

The ramen assistant manager quit. Changmin took over his job and got paid more. That was all he wanted. He knew that come spring, his job would cut into his surfing time, but his sister’s education was more important than surfing.

One month into the coldness of winter, Changmin met Yunho. The man was twelve years older than him, but beautiful and experienced. The thoughts of sex in Changmin’s head became a reality.

Despite this and Changmin’s growing love for Yunho, he thought about Yoochun a lot over the next few months. He didn’t think just about sex with Yoochun though that was a recurring theme. He wondered if sex was even possible between them because merpeople had to procreate somehow. Changmin had no idea. But he was determined to ask Yoochun the next time they met.

Changmin daydreamed about merpeople and at night when he couldn’t sleep, wrote the words in his head down into fantastical stories. He had no idea if they were true or not. Only Yunho ever read them and said they were really good and he should submit them to some place and get them published. Changmin wanted Yoochun to read them.

Did Yoochun even know how to read the same way that Changmin did?

Changmin doubted it.

Like most nights when he had extra time, Changmin was at the beach. He stood at the end of the pier, cold wind buffeting his body, and wondered what went into warrior training and how Yoochun was doing.

An arm snaked around his waist and cold lips pressed against the space just below his ear. Changmin smiled and turned his head enough to accept a kiss from Yunho.

“I have a feeling I’m going to have to learn to surf to keep your attention,” Yunho whispered as soon as Changmin turned his attention back to the water.

Changmin smiled. “You’re going to have to learn to surf because it’s awesome. And I would love to see your body in a skin tight wetsuit.”

Yunho returned the smile and they watched the sun move toward the horizon.

“You’re stalling.”

Changmin sighed. “Do you blame me?”

“No, but ...”

Changmin waited, and when Yunho did not keep talking, he turned around. Yunho kept his arms around him, and his warm, gloved hands slipped under Changmin’s open jacket and settled just above his ass.

“But?” Changmin prompted.

“I’m serious about this and I’m serious about you. I’m not sure how serious you are.”

Changmin frowned but had nothing to say.

“I know you’re still young--”

Changmin’s scowl deepened; he hated it when Yunho called him young.

“--and I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, but the sooner you come out to your mother, the happier you’ll be because you won’t have to hide anymore.”

Changmin stepped into his warmth and put his chin on the other’s shoulder. Knowing Yunho was right and actually coming out to his mother were two different things. They hadn’t been dating long enough for Changmin to spill all his secrets. Yunho was smart (part of the reason why Changmin liked him), so Changmin knew he’d figured some things out, but Changmin still hadn’t told him how he dropped out of school, how their father left them, how their mother did nothing more than work and drink soju, or how he hadn’t really been sure if he was gay or not until Yunho had first kissed him. And was he completely gay or could he find a girl and get married and not disappoint his mother even more?

“You don’t understand.”

“I’m sorry,” Yunho said. “I won’t pressure you. “

“There are a lot of things that I haven’t told you that I ...”

“You don’t trust me.”

Changmin winced and pulled away enough to meet his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Yunho whispered and pressed a light kiss to his lips. “I’m acting old and being overbearing again, I know.”

“It’s only been a couple of months,” Changmin continued and broke away from Yunho’s arms. He rebuttoned his coat and shoved his hands in his pockets.

Yunho quickly moved to walk next to him and hooked his arm through Changmin’s. The nice thing about them being so close in height was that neither of them really took the lead when they were out, but they shared it. Changmin did like that about Yunho. Most of the time he did treat him as an equal despite their age difference.

“I don’t trust you yet,” Changmin finally said.

“I know.”

Instead of going to Changmin’s home, like originally planned, they went to Yunho’s and Changmin forgot about everything but the feel of skin, the feel of heat, and the feel of Yunho slamming into him from behind.

\---

Yoochun attempted to slide out of woven hammock without disturbing Sooyoung, but she was always such a light sleeper, and the hammock was not as steady as their rockbed.

Sooyoung smiled up at him, sleepy and content. Yoochun leaned down and pressed lips to her forehead.

“I will be back,” he whispered.

Sooyoung hummed. “So mysterious.”

“I will tell you one day.”

“I know. Be safe.”

Yoochun smiled and ran his hand along Sooyoung’s growing stomach. “I always am.” He moved to the next room and retrieved his spear and knife. Quietly, he swam through an upper window and moved above the city. There were very few merpeople out at this time of darkness. But he knew that one would be waiting for him near the edge of the village.

Soon, he was no longer swimming alone, Jaejoong speeding along next to him. His relationship with Jaejoong had blossomed into something different. Yoochun still found Jaejoong incredibly attractive, and they were still best friends, but now they were more like brothers than anything else. Their parents had held their pairings at the same time, to cement their bond as a family. And soon, Jaejoong would be his Clan Leader. There was no room for those kinds of feelings in their relationship. But Yoochun still had them.

But Jaejoong had promised that he would follow him when he went to go see Changmin, and Jaejoong had kept that kiss promise. Yoochun went to the surface every time the night sun was full in the sky, and Jaejoong always went with him.

Jaejoong thought he was crazy to continue holding on to the thought of his human. Yoochun had everything that had been kept from him. He was now one of the Warriors in their clan, he had paired with Sooyoung only a few tide cycles ago, and she was going to have their child soon.

Every time Jaejoong questioned him, Yoochun said, “I promised.”

Jaejoong could not reprimand him for keeping a promise that was cemented with a kiss, especially when he had witnessed the kiss and the feelings between them.

He could not stop the smile from breaking over his face as he and Jaejoong sped toward the shore. The last five full night suns, the water at the surface was still so very cold. But the sixth had held promise but no Changmin. The sun was rising sooner, and the air when Yoochun carefully surfaced held a touch of warmth.

Yoochun wanted to go to the beach more often, but with his new duties and his soon-to-be fatherhood, he did not have time. He hoped to meet Changmin before his child was born. He would have even less time after that.

What felt like hours later, they arrived at the rock that jutted out of the ocean’s surface. Yoochun rose to the surface with Jaejoong right next to him. They slowed cautiously and their heads broke. Yoochun inhaled the tangy air and turned to Jaejoong with a smile.

Jaejoong raised an eyebrow at him and gestured behind him.

Yoochun spun around and saw the obvious figure of someone straddling a surfboard nearer toward shore. He wanted to jump and cry out and swim to him as fast as he could, but Jaejoong placed a cautious hand on his shoulder.

Yoochun nodded and they both ducked back under to swim closer to make sure the lone surfer was indeed Changmin.

The water grew a bit harsher as they went closer to shore. Yoochun rode the waves, staying in each curl, careful to keep his tail and head below the surface. Within a few minutes, he knew that the surfer was Changmin. He double checked the area, made sure that Changmin was indeed alone, and then shot to the surface, curled his body and splashed back in the water to get Changmin’s attention. The second one proved that Changmin was looking at him, and he faintly heard his name shouted over the sound of the surf.

After one more acrobatic flip in the air, Yoochun settled down and swam the rest of the way to Changmin. As soon as he was within reach, Changmin launched himself off his surfboard and into Yoochun’s waiting arms. They dropped before the surface, twisted through the next swell, and then surfaced with Changmin’s arms around Yoochun’s neck and Yoochun supporting him with his sturdy tail and arms around his waist.

“I almost convinced myself that you weren’t actually real,” Changmin gasped once he had cleared the water from his mouth.

Unable to help himself, Yoochun tangled his hand in Changmin’s hair and pulled his head down close enough to kiss. A bit of guilt flew through him, but Changmin was human. He did not exactly count, and it had been too long since they had last touched each other. Changmin stiffened in his arms and then relaxed and his mouth opened and they shared a salty kiss. His legs wrapped around Yoochun’s tail, foot sliding lower, and Yoochun shivered as pleasure twisted through him.

When they broke away, Yoochun could only smile at him, keeping them afloat.

Changmin reached to his shoulder, running his hand first over the kelp and bone sash and then further back to touch the spear.

“You’re training now?” Changmin asked.

Yoochun nodded.

“And so strong,” Changmin said and ran his hands over and down Yoochun’s arms.

“I wonder why I worried so much,” Yoochun replied, “but now everything is okay. I am training as a Warrior now, and my father is very happy about that. And Sooyoung was deemed proper for me and we were paired together, and I will be a father soon.”

Changmin’s smile fell and he leaned away from Yoochun.

Yoochun stared at him carefully. “What?”

“You ... you’re married?”

“Married?”

“With a girl? With a mermaid?”

Yoochun smiled. “With Sooyoung, yes. She is Jaejoong’s younger sister. We have been betrothed for most of our lives and she was deemed proper for me.”

“But I thought--” Changmin turned his entire body away and got ahold of his board.

Yoochun was surprised by the move and did not stop him.

Changmin hoisted himself onto it and sat up. He stared out into the ocean, frowning.

“What is it?” Yoochun asked, touching his knee.

Changmin smiled down at him. “Nothing. Just ... I thought ...”

Yoochun suddenly understood and he moved to the side of the board and folded his arms over it. He smiled softly. “I still find you attractive, I still find you desirable, but ...”

Changmin rubbed his arms and nodded. “But ... yeah, I get it. The whole separate species thing. And you’re in the water and I’ve got legs and you’re fucking married.”

Changmin hit his board and Yoochun jumped, slipping off. Changmin leaned over the nose and started paddling for shore.

“Changmin, wait. Please. What’s wrong?”

Changmin stopped and turned his face to the side, pressing it against the deck . Changmin let Yoochun grab his hand and their eyes met. Changmin’s eyes were sad, the light had seemed to fade. Changmin ran his finger over Yoochun’s cheek.

“Your life sounds like it’s all falling in place, and mine is still spiraling out of my control.”

Yoochun frowned and moved close enough to again lean on the board, putting their faces close. “Tell me.”

Changmin took a very deep breath and told Yoochun about finishing school, about his mother’s drinking, his sister following in her brother’s footsteps even though he worked very hard to keep her in school. And Yunho. He told Yoochun all about Yunho, and how he felt possessed, like he was a thing and it wasn't just Yunho but every aspect of his life.

Everything but surfing, and when he was surfing, when he was in the water he was free.

“I thought I was going to get to share that freedom with you, but to you, I guess I’m just another thing. Your human.”

Yoochun’s frown deepened. He ran a finger along Changmin’s chin and cupped his cheek with webbed fingers. “We are friends. The way I wish to posses you is not possible, so instead, I will call you my friend. Are you my friend, Changmin?”

Changmin swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded. “Yes,” he managed to say. “Yes, of course.”

“Promise?” Yoochun whispered.

Changmin’s smile was fleeting and then he was leaning forward and their lips touched, and Yoochun felt less guilty for this kiss. Changmin twisted suddenly and fell off his board. Again they sank below the calming waves and then surfaced. Their lips parted, their eyes met and then they kissed again. Changmin moaned, sliding his legs along Yoochun’s tail.

Yoochun shivered. He did not want to break away from the kiss, but he had to, at least for a moment. He pressed their foreheads together and shut his eyes. “Every time the night sun is full, I will be here to watch the sunrise with you. This will be our last Kiss Promise, because I’m sure my pair would not approve even if she would understand. And your Yunho sounds like he would not approve either.”

Changmin chuckled and pressed a lingering kiss to Yoochun’s cold, pale lips. “I don’t like the idea of never kissing you again.”

“A Kiss Promise is forever. I will come and meet you here forever.”

“And we’ll be friends.”

“Yes. I will be the only one who is friends with a human.”

“And no one will believe me if I tell them I’m friends with a merman.”

“You’re freezing. You need to get to shore.”

Changmin nodded. “I do. It’ll be a lot warmer in one month. I will be here, waiting for you.”

“Me, too.”

Instead of putting Changmin back on his board, Yoochun curled to his back and held Changmin against his chest. Slowly, he propelled them to the shore. And they kissed through the entire trip.

\---

Changmin stopped in the entryway to Yunho’s apartment. He dropped his bag that held his wetsuit and leaned his board against the front closet door. He looked around at the dimly lit space. Almost without meaning to, he’d kind of moved in. Not because Yunho had asked him to, but because he didn’t want to go home and he had some place to run away to.

That wasn’t a good enough reason to be living with someone.

Changmin moved into the kitchen and started coffee. The red glow of the sunrise bathed the white tiles in muted oranges and pinks. He leaned against the counter and thought about Yoochun.

Yoochun who had grown up his entire life not being strong enough, fast enough, manly enough.

And now, the Yoochun who he saw.

Yoochun had not given up. Yoochun had worked hard to be who he wanted to be.

Changmin had not done that.

Changmin had ran away.

The harder things got for him at home, the more time he spent at work and here, and now that it was warm enough, he’d probably spend more time away from home and on the water.

“Good morning,” Yunho mumbled as he staggered into the kitchen. He wore only boxers, his body on display for Changmin’s eyes. And Changmin looked over his strong thighs and firm stomach and chest. Yunho came right to Changmin, put his arms around his waist and pressed his face into Changmin’s cool neck. “You’ve already been out on the water?”

Yunho pulled away from him in surprise.

“Sometimes I like to watch the sun rise on the water. It’s beautiful. Calming, relaxing.”

Yunho shook his head. “Crazy. It’s still cold out.”

“It’s not too bad.”

“You taste like ocean. Come and shower with me?”

Changmin pondered him for a moment, head tilted.

“What?” Yunho asked, touching his cheek. It was almost the same gesture as when Yoochun had touched him.

“I need to move out.”

Yunho’s lip twitched in a grin. “I hadn’t realized you had moved in.”

“You know what I mean. I ...” Changmin leaned against Yunho’s hand, but looked away. “I need to go home. I need to t-take care of my mother. My sister, my ... I need to be home.”

Yunho pulled him forward for a strong kiss. “Yes, you do. Are you breaking up with me?”

Changmin’s eyes went wide. “No, hyung. No way. Definitely not.”

Yunho smirked. “Good. Come shower with me and I’ll take you home.”

\---

_Do not go above the surface._

Taemin sat just under the surface of the ocean. The waves ebbed above him. He tilted his head back and felt the heat of the sun on his face and smiled.

Technically. He wasn’t above the surface. The only people he never heard say that were his father and his uncle Yoochun. They warned him of the dangers of going above the surface, but they never outright said he could not.

His tail swayed, green blending in with the ocean around him. The urge to take a lungful of dry air was so tempting.

Too tempting. He let the next swell of water raise him higher and his face broke free and wind (actual wind!) caressed his skin. He held his breath, felt his gills gape open on the side of his body. Instinctively, his mouth opened and he sucked in air, falling back into the water and choking on it.

But it was enough. A crisp feeling, almost burning, filled his lungs and he launched up for another mouthful.

His eyes snapped open when he realized that he hadn’t been paying attention. He was facing the beach, and he was much closer than he thought. Panic built in him for a moment, and then he caught sight of his first human. Well, there were three humans, playing in the shallows where the waves broke and crashed onto the sand.

Two of the humans were tall. With long, long legs.

Taemin stared and stared and stared, eyes wide. They actually had legs. Legs!

The other human was smaller than the others.

A hand touched his arm and Taemin jumped, eyes wide and terrified. His uncle Yoochun smiled at him and then looked back at the humans. The small one was trying his best to stand up on something in the waves. The other two were cheering him on.

It reminded Taemin of his father and uncle Yoochun encouraging him during swimming trials.

“Humans can be dangerous,” Yoochun whispered.

Taemin nodded. “I know.”

“But they aren’t all dangerous.”

One human suddenly froze and Taemin was scared again to realize he was looking out at them, but his Uncle kept his hand on his shoulder.

“That’s Changmin,” Yoochun said, “with his nephew Jonghyun. Maybe one day, you’ll get to meet him.”

Taemin looked up at his uncle in awe. “You know them?”

Yoochun smiled. “I know Changmin. I have never met Yunho, who is his paired.”

“He paired with a male?”

Yoochun chuckled. “Yes, and he’s quite happy. But come on. We cannot get closer and there are too many humans on the beach. Someone may see us.”

“I think he has,” Taemin said, a bit scared.

“Probably,” Yoochun replied. “Changmin knows how to spot me when I surface around here.”

Yoochun slipped under the water, pulling Taemin with him. Taemin took one more breath of air and then followed his uncle.

He came face to face with his father and winced. His father had his muscled arms tightly crossed over his chest. He opened his mouth to apologize and swear to never go up to the surface again, but then his uncle touched his father’s shoulder and his father relaxed.

“I’ll watch over him,” Yoochun whispered, “just like you watch over me.”

“Promise?” his father asked, just as quietly and Taemin just barely stifled his gasp when his father and his uncle kissed lightly.

“I promise.”

Taemin felt like he had no gills and no lungs and he was stuck on a beach full of sand.

“You must swear that you will never tell anyone,” Jaejoong said.

Taemin’s eyes went wide. “N-no, Father. Never.”

“Good. Come. Your mother, aunt and cousin are probably wondering where we are.”


End file.
